Where is the Hindrance?  Our life is usually so hectic that we quite easily lose ourselves.  Zazen is a wonderful opportunity to face and closely study ourselves.  In a way, it is almost a joke to have to find out who we are or to realize what our life is.  Our life, this life, is already in realization.  It is already manifesting, so what is there to look for?  When we look for something, Buddha calls this delusion.  Unfortunately, this is what all of us do one way or another.

from Appreciate Your Life by Taizan Maezumi Roshi

Sharing below a reflection of my delusions in 2009.  Still, I have been blessed to find these many paths that allow me to walk out my practice.  I think I’ve caught almost all – except for the running – which may have to wait for another time.

It started in January with an unexpected chance to record the priest ordination at Upaya while I was there for a calligraphy retreat with Kaz Tanahashi.  In Spring, playing chauffeur, tour guide and close protection for roshi during her talks on hospice care and a Summer of preparing for jukai back at Upaya.  Then a side trip to San Francisco on the way home.

And home… the refuge of five kitties, wild birds, dragon fruit, and snow.

And home 2… the beach…

I still haven’t figured out how to get all this attached to  music.  That’s my delusion for 2010, I guess.

I hope you enjoy it.

Please have deep conviction and trust in yourself to be truly Yourself.  There is no other way.  By doing so, you will have a deep confidence and respect for yourself.  Going one step further, since the life of each of us contains everything, taking care of yourself is taking care of everything else, do you see?

Taizan Maezumi

Thank you for practicing,

Genju